by. Helen Hunt Jackson
That so much change should come when thou dost go,
Is mystery that I cannot ravel quite.
The very house seems dark as when the light
Of lamps goes out. Each wonted thing doth grow
So altered, that I wander to and fro
Bewildered by the most familiar sight,
And feel like one who rouses in the night
From dream of ecstasy, and cannot know
At first if he be sleeping or awake.
My foolish heart so foolish for thy sake
Hath grown, dear one!
Teach me to be more wise.
I blush for all my foolishness doth lack;
I fear to seem a coward in thine eyes.
Teach me, dear one,—but first thou must come back!
You loved me,
for a hot second.
I almost believed you,
for a hot second.
You're gone now,
and I have nothing to show.
The same side of my bed is empty.
How did you know
that was my new favourite song.
You can't have it
it's MINE.
People come into your life because you allow them to,
because you want them so much that you will them into existence
almost as if making a wish and having it granted.
OR because you've put so much negative energy into trying to keep them away that
in fact, you never allow them to leave.
Give up on me, I'm not going anywhere, I've already seen it all.
Let me go.
I can sit on porches into the late hours of night, that begin to blur with mornings,
and forget how much you've taken from me.
I can put it in the past, because that's where it belongs.
Maybe it's a mixture of the cheap booze and crisp night breeze
the same breeze that once slipped between the space our bodies created as you held me close
as we said our goodbyes that never wanted to end
on my porch steps so many summers ago.
Maybe it's just my fondness for nostalgia that brings you to mind.
I wish you could stop sitting on porches talking about how much I've hurt you
and remember those summer nights we shared.
