'Better Every Day'

I just saw pictures of a friend of mine back in treatment. I just don't understand why she keeps choosing her disease over LIFE? She is one of the most intelligent, funny, and compassionate people I have ever met, but what she does to her body is so ugly to me now. I'm praying for God to surround her in Light and Love, to help her realize how perfect she is, to choose Life over death. That is ultimately the decision one has to make when battling such a deadlly disease.

I remember when I made that choice. I remember how hard it was, to just 'let go' of the one thing that felt like my best friend. That was nearly 2 years ago. It has been 8 months since I've purged. I am so proud to say that. I remember when I we use to celebrate a decrease in the amount of times I would throw up in a day, then we'd move on to days inbetween purges, then weeks. I remember having to have my boyfriend come over and sit with me while I ate a meal, when my family would have to coach me through dinners, when my step mom use to have to plan and serve all my meals, meal planning, counting calories, measuring everything with total accuracy - it was always SO hard, so much work, such a dramatic struggle, but now it's been MONTHS! 8 months, almost a whole year! It brings tears to my eyes, tears of joy and pride because I WON! I can't even recollect that last time I thought about throwing up my food or had the urge to.... and I use to struggle making it through a day. After nearly 8 years of hating myself, I have embraced the divine perfection that has always been 'Me.' I SURVIVED! I BEAT THE STATISTIC! I CHOSE LIFE!

I use to be embarrassed of the demon I was living with, but it is part of my past, it no longer defines who I am now. I WAS an anorexic & bulimic since I was in 7th grade, but that is 8 years ago, today I am Alicia Rose VanOverbeke: a daughter, a sister, a part of one crazy dysfunctionally brilliant family, a friend, and a student who will one day put a positive stamp on this World. I am so proud of the battle I won, and the woman I have now become. I hope one day I can inspire others to choose life, it may be the more resistant path but it is the only one that guarantees a future, happiness and freedom!

Thank you Dr. Maureen Gardner and everyone at the RCC who was fighting with me and for me, Dr. Bethany Helfman, Mom, Dad, Lisa, & the whole family, Samantha Meux, Brittany Guttenburg, Alex Wojcik and all my other friends who showed me so much love and compassion and stuck with me when they didn't have to, everyone at MASC Leadership Camp [especially Kadi Judd and Kris Edler who told me I was "Dark yet lovely"], and to everyone else who has inspired and supported me to keep fighting, to get 'Better Every Day.' You all saved my life, and I am forever grateful.